Finding the light

From the first moment we stepped into social sciences, we were taught, to think outside of the box. We are moulded into free thinking, dynamic, intellectually driven people. But once the degree is up on the wall, and the thesis has been printed, the reality of the world sets in. The comfy couch of academia that we find ourselves in becomes uncomfortable and the lure of ‘changing the world’ calls to us.

But real life will set in soon and we realise that the only people that we will be able to change is the little ones that we choose to have.

For me, I have come to terms with the fact that I might never change the world with what I know, but what I know has changed me. To the extant, that I see the world so differently, that it’s difficult at times to have a normal conversation with people. Because at some point I will relate it to Anthropology and people will just look at me and go, huh?

And then the job hunting begins. It is horrible! I hate constantly trying to sell myself, when all I was ever trained to do is understand everyone else. I hate getting rejection letter after rejection letter. While I believe that you are where you are meant to be…the rejection sucks! IT JUST SUCKS! And don’t even talk about the dreaded line “So what do you actually do?” And the blank look people have when you say, “I wanna go into Social Research”

I didn’t know that the social sciences job field is extremely limited and according to some, very biased. I didn’t know that I would have to not only understand statistics but that I would have to actually use it! I didn’t know that companies would rather employ a BCOM grad student to do Qualitative research rather than a Masters student in social sciences. I know the world is unfair at times. But the recession has affected us in ways that the cushy couch of Academia cannot understand and as far as I know, have not even recognised.

I am trying to find the light in this dark tunnel and reconcile what I love and what I need. In a perfect world, I would lecture and do research and have enough money not to need to get another job. In reality, jobs in lecturing require PHD's or they are non existent, my bank account is alone and empty and my debt is growing nicely.

I am afraid of making the choice between money and love, and eventually regretting the decision, because the social research field is highly competitive, extremely small and require five years experience that has nothing to do with your masters. I could go to London, which seems like it is overrun with social jobs, but I need money to that! Which I don't have because the job that I love, does not pay the money that I need.

I am living in a vortex of contradiction, and would love to hear any advice that can help me out of it. If you experience the same thing…let me know too.